Dust

And so, after the final wind of a life time blew and stole my final sensible breath, I pulled the thick, coarse rope, feeling the rough material rub my hard, calloused hands. Hands that had gripped this rope so many times. Pulling it the same way for years.

But this time every fiber of my body knew it was different. Every nerve knew this was unlike any other time. Every neuron knew this was the last.

I pulled the rope again, the bell clanged loud and hard above me. I could feel the air waves vibrating down on me. Gravity forcing them to rain down on my shoulders and slump my posture even more. The blow of the bell startled the birds in the top of bellfry and they flew off, into the brightening dawn. Dust, dirt and bits of twigs fell down on me and invaded my nostrils as I inhaled deeply. I fought a sneeze and pinched my nose between my fingers, paralyzing myself for a moment and squeezing my eyes shut tight. Pain appeared behing my eyes and small white shars began dancing in my lack of vision, fluttering around freely. I enjoyed them for a moment, closing my eyes tighter to increase the pain.

There would be no pain after this, after this morning. I opened my eyes again, sneeze having passed, and I found myself cursed and blessed with tunnle vision for a moment. I looked up, watching the bell come to a slow swinging stop.

The birds gone, the bell still and the wind nonexistant, I felt alone. Pleasantly alone for the first time. Perfectly alone. I rubbed my rough hands on my jeans quickly then stepped over to the Western cut out in the wall of the bell tower. The ledge stood waist high and I leaned over it, peering down about 20 yards to the ground. Nothing moved down below. Maybe in the houses, men readying for work, women preparing breakfast for the family and children begging for another 5 minutes of sleep.

And there I stood, in the pale dark, hanging out of a bellfry. My home, my friend, my life. I swung a leg over the side and pulled myself up. The other leg followed and I sat on the ledge.

My heart beat roughly for a moment but I closed my eyes and steadied it as I steadied myself. I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. The sun had just begun creasing over the horizon. I could already feel it's natural warmth loosening the cold blood in my veins.

As the atmosphere slowly lightened I raised my hand n front of my face and studied them. Calouses on the palms, dirt in the creases, short and broken nails. They were rough and worn, having never enjoyed the simple pleasures or the Utopian lifestyle below.

I looked down between my knees to the ground. Brown, dirty, far away. The yellow eye was a semicircle on the horizon now and I transfered my focus to my old shoes. Torn and mud-ridden. Barely covered by unwashed, tattered jeans. My attention was stolen then by a few mother bird returning to their offspring with food. I leaned back and listened to the baby birds chirp hungrily.

The sun was now three quarters of the way over the horizon. I smiled a little, for just a moment, then gripped the wall beside me. I hoisted myself to a standing position and hugged the wall for balance. I teetered a little but chuckled as I caught myself.

I now stared directly at the sun, watching it rise slowly. Nothing went through my mind, for there was nothing worth thinking about. The sun crept upward, like a child far away had lost it's giant yellow balloon.

The very bottom of it's circumfrence ter of the ledge. I stared into the incredthe center of the ledge. I stared into the incredible glow for a moment, nearly blinding myself, the grinned from ear to ear. The most genuine smile I had evr managed.

One more deep breath, one more moment. Then I stepped from the ledge and flew. For one glorious moment, I flew.
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Excuse typos, I don't normally read what I write.